Alexandra sat on the soft grass; her shawl pulled tightly around her shoulders. She gazed out to the supernatural view, trying to find warmth but the cold she felt came from within. Right beside her, Rohan watched her, his heart weighed down by the familiar ache of their conversations about the future. They had met here many times, but tonight felt different. A heaviness lingered, something they both sensed but couldn’t put into words.
“Alex,” he began, his voice thick with emotion, “I know everyone will tell you to follow your heart, to move if that’s what you really want. But sometimes, staying isn’t just about settling or being afraid of change. Sometimes, staying is about recognising what you already have and what you’d be leaving behind. And I - ” He stopped, the words catching in his throat. He took a deep breath, knowing he had to say it, even if it was selfish. “It would be lonely without you.”
She looked away, back toward the horizon, her expression softening as she considered his words. “I do know,” she said quietly. “But I also know that you think about leaving too. You talk about how you would thrive somewhere else, to be doing something completely different. You dream about it sometimes. So how can you ask me to stay when you can’t even make up your own mind?”
Rohan flinched inwardly at her words, the truth of them struck deep. He had often imagined what it would be like to leave, to start fresh somewhere else, free from the ties that bound him to this place. The idea of leaving was appealing in theory, but every time he considered it, he found himself unable to take the leap. Leaving felt like abandoning something vital - something he couldn’t quite put into words.
He looked at Alexandra, sensing her restlessness, the same desire for more that he often felt himself. "I’m not saying that staying is easy," he admitted quietly. “I get that you want more.”
Alexandra turned her head toward him, catching the vulnerability in his voice. She took a moment, letting the weight of his words settle. "I don’t want to stay here forever, Rohan," she began, her voice almost challenging. "There’s a whole world out there, experiences I haven’t had, knowledge I can’t gain here."
Rohan nodded, leaning back slightly. "I get it. But what makes you think those experiences are inherently more valuable because they are elsewhere? What if the depth you’re looking for isn’t in the novelty but in the familiar?"
Alexandra turned to face him fully. "Isn’t that just a way of rationalising comfort over courage? New places, new faces - they challenge us, push us out of our boundaries. You’re suggesting that we can find the same growth here, in a place where we already know every street, every turn."
Rohan looked into her eyes, recognising the spark of defiance. "But is growth only found in discomfort? Does it always have to be a challenge, or can it also be about understanding and accepting what we have, about looking deeper rather than further?"
Alexandra’s frown deepened, sensing the conversation shifting to deeper territory. She knew this was only the beginning - they had danced around this argument many times, but tonight, something felt different. Tonight, they were both speaking not just of places, but of themselves.
She reengages by saying, "That sounds like a defence of stagnation. People who stay often tell themselves they’re growing in place, but isn’t that just a justification for not wanting to take risks?"
Rohan’s eyes sharpened. "Not necessarily. Look at a tree. It grows taller, its roots sink deeper, but it remains in the same place. Its strength comes from its groundedness. If you rip it up and plant it somewhere else, it might die before it has a chance to adapt. Are you saying the tree is stagnant because it doesn't uproot itself?"
"Trees don’t have a choice, Rohan," Alexandra retorted. "We do. And we have ambitions. We don’t just survive; we strive for more. You’re talking about staying as if it’s this enlightened choice, but it’s just fear dressed up in philosophical terms."
Rohan paused, considering her words. "Maybe for some, it is fear," he conceded. "But there’s another side to this. What if leaving is just another form of running away? A way to escape the discomfort of staying still, of facing what you don’t like in yourself or your surroundings?"
Alexandra leaned forward, her eyes bright with argument. "So, you think I want to leave because I’m running away from something here?"
He met her gaze steadily. "I think many people leave because they believe happiness or fulfilment is somewhere else. It’s like chasing the horizon - you never actually get there. Maybe the problem isn’t the place but the expectation that somewhere else is inherently better."
"So, you’re suggesting I should stay and find contentment in what I already know?" she countered. "But what if I’m meant for something bigger? What if staying means never realising my potential, never knowing what I’m truly capable of?"
Rohan’s voice softened a hint of a smile on his lips. "What if ‘something bigger’ isn’t tied to a place but to a state of mind? What if your potential has nothing to do with geography but with what you’re willing to face within yourself?"
She sighed, rubbing her temples. "You talk like this is some kind of spiritual quest, Rohan. But there’s more to life than introspection. There are actual opportunities I could be missing by staying here - funding, networks, mentors. Things I can’t get if I stay stuck in this small village."
Rohan nodded. "And those things matter. I’m not denying that. But think about this: what’s the end goal of all those things? You want mentors, opportunities, funding… to what end? To build something meaningful, right? What if the foundation for that meaningful work could be stronger here, where you have roots, where you already understand the culture and the people? Isn’t meaning found in purpose, not just in opportunity?"
Alexandra’s expression softened, but her voice remained firm. "You’re right that purpose is important, but can’t purpose be found anywhere? Why should I limit myself to what’s here when the world is so much bigger?"
Rohan leaned closer, intensity in his gaze. "What if the purpose isn’t about scope but depth? You think the world is bigger, but maybe that’s because you haven’t truly explored what’s right here."
Alexandra took a deep breath, her mind racing. "You’re saying that if I leave, I’m overlooking what’s in front of me, but what if I’ve already seen it all? What if I’ve taken all this place has to offer, and now it’s time for something new?"
Rohan paused, weighing her words carefully. "Then maybe it is time. But my point is, don’t choose to go just because the world says bigger is better. Don’t fall for the idea that staying means being afraid or small-minded. Sometimes it takes more courage to stay - to make the most of what you have, to build something meaningful right where you are."
Alexandra breathed deeply, her mind racing as she absorbed the layers of their conversation. "Okay, let’s assume I stay," she began, testing the words on her tongue. "I stay, and I find… purpose, meaning, whatever you want to call it. But what if that meaning still feels small? What if I’m meant for something that goes beyond the borders of this place?"
Rohan leaned back slightly, considering her point. "Then maybe you are. But ask yourself, what defines ‘small’? Is it the size of the place, or is it the impact you have? A poet writing in a small village could write words that touch the entire world. A scientist working in a modest lab could make a discovery that changes lives. Is their work any less significant because of where it began?"
Alexandra crossed her arms, mulling over his words. "But what if that poet or scientist could do even more with the right resources, the right connections? Isn't there a practical side to this? I can’t just ignore the reality of what’s out there - the access to better technology and broader networks. There’s a reason people leave, Rohan."
Rohan nodded. "True, there are practical advantages. But let’s turn that on its head. What if you have the chance to create something with less? To innovate without the crutch of endless resources? Sometimes scarcity forces creativity. It pushes you to think in ways you wouldn’t otherwise."
She sighed, a hint of frustration creeping in. "So now you’re saying limitations are good? That struggling is somehow more noble?"
He smiled, but there was a seriousness in his eyes. "Not necessarily more noble. But it’s a different kind of growth. Think about it - when do people grow the most? It’s not always in abundance, but in challenge, in the absence of easy answers. You’re a scientist, Alexandra. You know that discovery often comes from working within constraints, not with unlimited possibilities."
Alexandra shook her head, unwilling to concede. "That’s romanticising hardship, Rohan. Not everyone grows through difficulty - some just break. And not everyone who leaves is running away from something. Maybe they are running towards something."
He nodded, acknowledging her point. "Fair. But I still think there’s a different kind of courage in staying. In saying, ‘I will make this work where I am, with what I have.’ It's not romanticising hardship - it's recognising that every choice has its own challenges. Leaving might bring new opportunities, but it also brings its own set of unknowns and struggles. Staying and facing what you know is just as brave, in a different way."
Alexandra fell silent, absorbing his words. "But I need to know, Rohan. If I stay, will I find what I’m looking for?"
Rohan smiled gently. "I don’t know," he admitted.
“But I do know that everyone's going to tell you to 'follow your dreams. They'll say, 'You only live once,' or 'The world is your oyster.' But these are empty platitudes, Alex. They're the verbal equivalent of a Hallmark card – designed to sound good without saying anything of substance."
He paced a few steps, gathering his thoughts. "The truth is that these clichés are a cop-out. They absolve the advice-giver of any real responsibility. It's easy to tell someone to chase their dreams when you don't have to deal with the consequences. It also means they get to feel good about themselves for a moment like they are supporting you like they are giving you wings. But they don’t care about what happens after, about the nights you lie awake wondering if you made the biggest mistake of your life. They don’t care about the loneliness that comes when you realise ‘finding yourself’ isn’t a destination but a long, winding road with no clear end.”
Alexandra's posture stiffened slightly, but she remained silent, listening.
"Here's also what they don't tell you," Rohan continued, his words gaining momentum. "Dreams are nebulous, ever-changing things. They're not a fixed point you can reach. And chasing them? That's a recipe for perpetual dissatisfaction."
Alexandra's expression softened slightly, but there was still resistance in her eyes.
He ran a hand through his hair, frustration evident in the gesture. "Those who tell you to just 'follow your heart' – they're not thinking about the complexity of human emotions. They're not considering the web of connections, memories, and shared experiences that make up a life. They're reducing existence to a series of checkboxes on some cosmic to-do list."
He took a deep breath, visibly trying to calm himself. "I'm not saying you should never leave or that growth doesn't sometimes require change. But I am saying that the constant glorification of 'moving on' and 'new horizons' is toxic. It devalues the present and teaches us to always be looking elsewhere for happiness."
Rohan continued, "I have also been thinking," his voice low, almost swallowed by the wind. "We spend our lives looking for a place that feels just right, a moment when everything finally makes sense. But what if there is no such place? No such moment? Just... this." He gestured towards the night lights, scattered and restless, a reflection of their own inner chaos.
He paused, letting the weight of his words settle. "We think of leaving as a way out," he continued, eyes fixed on the horizon, "as if somewhere else holds the answers we have been searching for. But the truth is..." He stopped, a shadow crossing his face. "The truth is, it doesn’t. There’s no 'right' place, no perfect choice. There is only here, only now, slipping through our hands like sand."
Rohan turned slightly, studying Alex’s profile. "You want to leave because you think you will find yourself out there," he said. "But who is this self you are looking for? The one you think is waiting beyond this skyline?" He shook his head, a rueful smile on his lips. "You won’t find her. Not because she isn’t there, but because she’s already here. Inside you. Leaving won’t change that."
This was also his own disillusionment. "Time isn’t something we escape from" he said, almost to himself. "It’s something we live inside. You think leaving will free you, but it’s just another way of running in circles. We’re always running... always moving through shadows, through echoes of choices we never made. ‘In my end is my beginning.' We think we are at the start of something when really, we’re just returning to where we have always been. In this city, in this moment... we are at the heart of the labyrinth, and there is no way out."
He glanced at her, seeing the tension in her jaw, the way her hands gripped the grass as if it were the edge of a precipice. "You want to know what to do," he said. "You want a resolution. But resolutions are illusions. The city won’t resolve itself for you, just as you won’t resolve yourself for the city." He took a breath, feeling the heaviness of his own thoughts. "Maybe what you need isn’t an escape, but a surrender. Not to the city, not to this place, but to the fact that you will never find the certainty you’re looking for."
Rohan turned away from the lights. “There is no magical answer, Alex, not in the way we imagine. We speak of leaving, of staying, as if they are separate paths - but aren't they just faces of the same coin? Movement within stillness?”
Alexandra frowned, the words twisting in her mind like smoke. “And what does that mean? That choosing doesn’t matter. That it’s all…"
“…..the endless cycle,” Rohan interrupted. "Like the river that turns, circles back, unending. Each moment of decision dissolves into the next. The city, the horizon - it’s all a reflection of what is within us. And so, we leave only to return to ourselves, over and over.”
He stepped closer, the wind lifting a strand of her hair. “Perhaps we become... something less and more at once. We talk of becoming as if it’s a point we can reach, but what if it is merely a way of seeing? To stand here, knowing there is no resolution - only the ongoing becoming, the same place seen anew each time?”
“And what if that seeing isn’t enough?” she murmured, almost to herself. “What if I leave and find only the same streets dressed in different names, the same distance between myself and where I want to be?”
Her eyes narrowed, scanning the sprawling expanse as if searching for some hidden key within the labyrinth of lights. “So, you’re saying we are trapped, then? That this choice, this leaving or staying, is just... running in circles?”
Alexandra’s breath caught, the echoes of his words resounding within her like a chime. “Then what, Rohan? What do we do if every road leads us back here?”
A pause filled the space between them. “We accept the journey,” he said finally, his voice almost a whisper, as if afraid the truth would shatter upon the air. “Not to arrive, but to arrive at not arriving. The city, the world - it’s all one great spiral, and we are merely passing through it, over and over.”
As they stood side by side, the vastness of the city stretched before them; they realised that the distance between staying and leaving wasn’t measured by miles but by the willingness to understand and accept.
Whether they chose to grow roots or to wander, the journey was not about finding a destination, but about finding each other - time and time again - no matter where life took them.